Poem: 'Unstill'

Another day has come.

The sun has risen and set

She looks at her fingers

Wonders how to get out of bed

Not how. Why.

The day goes by.

The sun has come out

After many a winter grey.

She loves the sun.

But somehow now it’s too bright, she finds.

This light, the happiness of the people around

Their joy in little things, little ways.

She goes to lunch, picks at her food

Wonders what it tastes like.

Not what, why.

Why, her friend asks

Is it something I said?

Something in your family?

Your relationship?

She shrugs. No. It’s all well

But somehow all awry.

If she were sad she could at least cry

If she were tired, lie in bed perhaps. But this?

The day’s gone by, she doesn’t remember

What she’s done with her time.

What happened yesterday?

What did you just say?

It’s like I’m hearing you through a tunnel

And something’s not right in my brain

Outside, people are freezing, suffering in the streets

She’s got a job, love, a roof over her head.

Things to look forward to, yet no joy.

Why so ungrateful, so unstill?

Somewhere a universe is imploding

Somewhere a child is crying

Somewhere a switch has come undone.

The sun has risen, it’s a beautiful day.

She looks at her fingers, gets out of bed.

Looks in the mirror:

she has never been more beautiful

or more afraid.